who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car."
--Author Unknown

Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children."
--Author Unknown

"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base."
--Dave Barry

"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men.  I just want to say to the authors of that study: "Duh."  

--Conan O'Brien